This week has been a rough week. A really, really rough week. Not necessarily for me personally, but for many people I know and love. I have prayed a lot this week. Others have prayed a lot this week. And sometimes, I can’t help but feel so defeated when those prayers aren’t answered the way that I would like them to be.
A precious friend of mine lost her twin babies yesterday, after going into preterm labor. A labor that couldn’t be stopped, no matter how hard she fought. And those beautiful babies were born too soon. I, personally, begged on bended knee for the lives of those babies. I know many others did as well. Prayer chains were started. They were added to prayer lists across town. I know that a momma, in a hospital bed, riddled with pain; both physical and emotional, begged in prayer for the lives of her babies. But God said “No.”. And as she held her tiny babies for the first, and last time, we all felt the weight of that answer.
Last weekend, two young boys were in a car accident. Two amazing, handsome, talented, brilliant, spunky, young boys; their entire lives ahead of them. One of those boys was injured so badly, he was taken to the hospital in a coma. And hundreds of children from his high school gathered in the glow of candles, and prayed for his life. Teachers, friends, an entire community; once again on bended knee. Begging God for a “Yes.” But God said “No.”. And, after we all waited with bated breath for two days, today we found out that darling young man would never wake up. And as parents hugged their children a little tighter, drove a little more carefully, and lectured on the importance of seat belts; we all felt the weight of that answer.
Jeremiah 29:11
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
So, what does it mean when God says “No.”? I’ve asked myself that many times this week. I’m not a pastor. I don’t know the right Scripture for this situation. But I know how it feels. It’s utter anguish. It’s paralyzing grief. It’s total helplessness. But, it is NOT hopelessness. And for that, I am so, incredibly grateful.
I know that God has His reasons. I know that He has a divine plan. I know that He works all things together for good, according to His will, and in His own timing. I cling to that hope. I grasp, desperately, to the promise that was made to us as Christ drew His last breath on Calvary. I know, that even when an answer is “no”, or “not right now”, or “wait”, or anything other than immediate relief, it is an answer according to God’s plan. And even if I don’t like it, “No” is still an answer. Every tear filled plea, every cry, every beg, every whispered prayer is heard. And every single one is answered.
And every baby, every precious high school boy, every hope of every prayer ever uttered; will be waiting for us one day, in our Heavenly home. So many promises will be fulfilled on the glorious day, when we meet Jesus face to face. For He has promised that “He will wipe every tear from their [our] eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4).
Yesterday, He said “no.”. And again today, He answered the same. And all I can do is praise Him. Praise Him for a promise, waiting for me one day. Praise Him for the times He says “yes.” Praise Him for the comfort He brings when the answers aren’t what we want to hear.
And it’s hard. It is so, brutally, hard. Being in this world, is hard.
I’m going to go to bed tonight, and give a prayer of thanks. For the times when He has said “yes.”. And I’m going to pray for healing, patience, and wisdom, for all the times He has said “no.” For all the times He will have to say “No.” again.
The thing I refuse to do, is stop praying. To throw up my hands in defeat. No matter how great the sorrow. I will never stop praying.
Erica Miller
The ASH Life 